Book Review: Swipe Left On Clutter

March 1, 2024

Amy-Ellen Trefsger of Distance Decluttering is a fellow Seattle based professional organizer and NAPO member. She recently wrote “Swipe Left on Clutter: Treat Decluttering Like Dating To Break Up With Your Stuff”. She is also an artist, and has decades worth of experience in social work and organizing. She’s got tons of knowledge and a load of compassion, but one of my favorite things about her is her sense of humor. From talking to her in-person, over the phone, or checking out her social media feed, she consistently makes me laugh. Laughter is the best medicine, and that’s why Amy-Ellen has been so successful helping her clients declutter. When I heard she just wrote a book, I instantly thought, “this is going to be good!”, and ordered a copy. You might be thinking, “There are so many organizing books on the market. What’s so special about this one?” I’ll answer that in this post!

First of all, this book is for adults-only, as it compares decluttering to dating. The content is right-on, but not appropriate for children. As you may know, the swiping culture of online dating can be superficial, make people feel disposable, not enough, and feelings can get hurt easily. Due to the nature of the dating apps, there is a big emphasis on looks and physicality. Amy-Ellen does a phenomenal job of making comparisons of the questions and struggles that come up with dating with the questions and struggles that come up with decluttering. When you look at decluttering through the same lens that you look at picking a mate, you’re able to think about your things from a much different perspective. I will also add, when you get really tuned in to knowing what “things” you want in your home and life, you’re able to be more decisive with the people you want to share your energy with. And vice-versa: by calibrating your senses to the people who you want in your life, you will gain more clarity with the possessions you allow to occupy space in your home.

Amy-Ellen’s sense of humor did not disappoint! The metaphors and analogies she made between decluttering and dating will surely make you laugh, but will also help you see your stuff (and the people in your life), in a new light. Her table of contents has titles like “Red Flags”, “Ghosting”, and, “Size Matters”. To give you a sense of humor, I loved this excerpt: “Ghosted items gradually come back to haunt us via guilt, fear of failure, or wastefulness. Wayyyy more menacing than the benign house ghost who leaves a few cupboard doors open.”

This book is well researched, siting important quotes, coined terms, and methodologies developed by other professional organizers who have made important contributions to the field of professional organizing. These pieces of information are sprinkled throughout the book. They are well documented, siting their original source. So by reading the book, not only do you get helpful advice from the author and exposed to other influential organizers, you get to chuckle along the way. Plus the book is short and sweet. I read it in a weekend and I’m a slow reader!

My favorite part of the book was when she described Tactile Sympathy. Tactile Sympathy was discovered by Judith Kolberg, one of the most important thought leaders in the world professional organizing. She is the author of several frequently referred to books by other organizers, including Conquering Chronic Disorganization. In 1989, Judith founded the National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization (now called the Institute of Challenging Disorganization (ICD)). Tactile Sympathy describes the phenomenon when people touch things, they have a harder time letting them go. Amy-Ellen’s comparison of Tactile Sympathy to break-up sex made me roll over laughing. The funniest part about it is that I know that Judith Kolberg helped edit the book, so she must have gotten a really good kick out of Amy-Ellen’s raunchy analogy. I also know that Lauren Williams of Casual Uncluttering (another Seattle based Professional Organizer) helped edit the book too. She’s also got an incredible sense of humor and eloquence of pairing words and phrases in a way that makes me crack up every time we speak. Amy-Ellen did a fabulous job of assembling her book editing team with only the best!

Amy-Ellen is a brilliant and witty writer and speaker, and she has done a fabulous job crafting her words together. The book is filled with bite sized tips to help you declutter with a smile on your face. And if you’re involved with the dating scene, you will probably become even more discerning about potential partners so that you can differentiate the special ones who you want to have in your life versus settling for “situationships” (also another chapter in the book.).

You can purchase your copy of Swipe Left On Clutter here.

About Amy-Ellen Trefsger aka “Decluttering Doula”

Amy-Ellen lives with her pet moss ball named Moe in a micro-sized apartment on the traditional lands of the Coast Salish peoples, the Duwamish Tribe.

Find more about her here:

Distance Decluttering Website

TikTok @ DeclutteringDoula

Instagram @DeclutteringDoula