Are You Afraid of Your Clutter?

October 21, 2024

Clutter doesn’t accumulate on it’s own. It’s there because it was put there. Maybe it was put there by you, or maybe it was put there by someone else. The reasons the clutter was created are the reasons why it can be scary to dismantle. There were probably very legitimate physical, mental, emotional, and possibly even spiritual reasons why the clutter was created in the first place. So if you’re finding yourself afraid of it, that’s very normal. In this post, I’ll list some of the top reasons why clutter can be so scary, and what to do about it.

Fears That Create Clutter

-The fear of making a particular decision. Maybe it’s the decision about whether or not to let go of a single object. But it could also be much bigger, such as an entire hobby or an entire collection. Or deciding whether or not to continue on with an art project, or whether you’re ever going to get around to fixing the broken [whatever you’ve been meaning to fix], or whether you’ll ever read a book you’ve been saving. The list goes on! Clutter is often just delayed decisions.

-The fear of having to face a difficult issue such as reconciling a bank account, processing the belongings of a loved one who’s passed away, or having to relive a traumatic event. Maybe you’ve buried a difficult memory under more and more clutter, such as an upsetting email that you printed out, the photo of a mean ex-boyfriend, or another sentimental object that brings up a lot of mixed emotions for you. These emotionally loaded objects can be very hard to face!

-You have a fear of missing out, and so you continually postpone the self-care of dealing with your clutter for more urgent or fun activities. You’d always rather be doing something else and you’re afraid to prioritize this time for yourself.

-You’re afraid of not being able to follow through and make any progress. You’re overwhelmed by the mess, you don’t know where to start, and you’re afraid of making a mistake. You fear that you don’t have the skills necessary to stay on track and make any lasting change. Maybe your anxiety level is so jacked up that you’re thinking so far ahead that you’re afraid of backsliding (before you even get it organized in the first place).

-You’re afraid of giving away something you’ll need.

-You’re afraid of spiders. (I’ve even abandoned a box in my garage because of a spider, and I’m not even very afraid of spiders!). My clients tell me this happens to them all the time, especially in sheds and basements.

-Clutter can sometimes be a coping mechanism for a bigger issue (such as keeping people away, over-shopping to self-soothe, collecting for a sense of safety, preserving the past, or any number of other issues). Dealing with the clutter may mean that you won’t have this coping mechanism available anymore, and that can be really scary!

-You are seriously wondering if your clutter (or entire home) is haunted.

What to do about it

-Start small!! Little hinges swing big doors. Do not force yourself to jump in and deal with the hard stuff first, unless you truly feel compelled to do it. Follow your joy and look for the next easiest thing to deal with. The more experience you get, the more confidence you will generate for yourself. This will help you trust yourself when making decisions as to what to donate and how to spend your time.

-Treat it like exposure therapy. Pay very close attention to your level of tolerance for dealing with the clutter. Work in short bursts and check in with your comfort level often. GRADUALLY allow yourself to do more and more as you feel more secure. Putting too much pressure on yourself (or exposing yourself to someone else who’s putting too much pressure on you) is not going to be helpful. If you find yourself flooded with emotions, you’ve pushed too far. Take a few steps back, and go easier on yourself next time. Even just spending 1 minute on your clutter on the first day and adding a minute each day may be your ticket to success.

-A lot can be accomplished by simply sorting, rather than forcing yourself to purge right off the bat. If you need more space to spread out, you might want to move things to another location (such as under tents in your back yard, a storage unit with ample space to spread out, or somewhere else). Sort items into basic categories, and refine how granular your categories are defined as you go. For example, if you have a bunch of art supplies, books, and clothing all jumbled together, separate into 3 categories: art supplies, books, and clothing. Once everything has been sorted into separate categories, pick on to focus on, and create sub-categories. For the art supplies, possible categories might include paint, adhesives, writing utensils, and paper. Once you’ve got all that divided up, you can refine even more. Paint might get divided up into watercolors, oils, and acrylics. Adhesives might get divided up into glue sticks, hot glue, white glue, rubber cement, masking tape, clear tape, etc. You get it!

-Break your task into manageable steps with a clear timeline. Create a quantifiable SMART goal for yourself. SMART stands for: Specific (not vague), measurable, attainable/achievable, relevant (keep in mind the overall purpose of the goal), and time-bound (a deadline). For example: Instead of saying “I will declutter my house”, which is very vague, use a SMART goal:

Specific: “I will declutter and organize my basement within 2 weeks.”

Measurable: “I will be able to easily walk from one side of the basement to the other.”

Achievable: “I will spend 30 minutes a day decluttering and organizing”.

Relevant: “Decluttering my basement will allow me create more storage space so I can free up more space upstairs.”

Time-bound: “I will complete this by the end of 2 weeks.”

Sure, it can be hard to know if 30 minutes a day will get you to your goal, but the idea is that you are creating a “to-do” box for yourself to check off every day so that you are continually working towards your goal. I HIGHLY recommend making a hard-copy of your checklist (drawing it out on a piece of paper or printing it out) so your goal stays top-of-mind.

-Take care of yourself! Connect with your emotions so you know when to give yourself a little push, and when to lay off the gas. Utilize healthy self-soothing methods such as breathing exercises, EFT tapping, or aroma-therapy to help regulate your nervous system so you can move forward.

-Think your home is haunted? Call Dina! Dina is an energy healer who is based in the PNW, and specializes in house clearings. Her company is called Moon Valley Healing.

-Get the help of a Professional Organizer. We’d love to help! Contact Seattle Sparkle to see how we can help you accomplish your goals.

Read another article I wrote on Organizing and Fear here.